Top 10 Things You Shouldn’t Do When Getting a Divorce

Your divorce can be a difficult time. There is the emotional aspect of ending your marriage, and then there are also complicated legal proceedings to deal with. You need someone on your side who understands the law and knows how to handle these types of sensitive matters. This blog post will list some things that you should not do when going through a divorce in order to protect yourself and your family as much as possible during this trying time.

 

 

1) Don’t blame your spouse for the divorce

One of the most important things to remember when going through a divorce is not blaming your spouse for getting divorced. It can be tempting, but this will only make things worse and it will affect how you treat them in front of children if you have any together. Remember that they are also going through an emotional process, so try to keep some perspective on the situation.

 

2) Don’t take all of your shared belongings

If there’s anything that would have spousal support or an equalization payment attached to it, it then doesn’t just walk out the door with it thinking that everything is yours to keep. Things may seem like they were more equal than they actually were, so be careful about any major acquisitions or purchases since this could make things harder for you when the time inevitably comes for negotiations.

 

3) If you have children, don’t try to get custody or visitation rights without a lawyer

Yes, this should go without saying but many people in this situation think that they can deal with it themselves when in reality, the system is not really set up for them to be successful on their own. If you get a child custody lawyer now, then at least you’ll receive advice and help from someone who will know what to do and can help guide your decisions without trying to make things worse by acting irrationally.

 

4) Don’t be rude to your spouse in front of the kids

If you are getting divorced, it is important not to be rude to your spouse in front of the kids. Young children are observant and can feel the tension and mood of a situation and try their best to be involved in whatever is going on. It is important not to be rude or show your frustration towards your spouse in front of your kids when you are divorcing. If this does occur, the child may think that they can’t be a valuable part of the family and will have resentment if they see their other parent unhappy around them. This will only make things worse for everyone involved during a difficult time.

Instead of the two parents going through a public sparring match, take the time to talk with your kids when tensions are calm and there is nothing but understanding on both sides. No matter how you may feel about the other parent, the best interest of your children is of the utmost importance. As such, painting your soon-to-be ex-spouse in a negative light goes against this key principle.

 

5) Don’t invade their privacy by snooping

One major issue that some people may face going through a divorce is the invasion of privacy. It should be avoided no matter how tempting or easy it can be to snoop around their spouse’s emails and documents without their consent or knowledge. This remains true no matter what kind of advantage or upper hand you may get from engaging in such conduct.

The reason this behavior is ill-advised relates to an important principle that should be adhered to when ending a marriage: maintaining respect during what is often a difficult time for both parties involved. You are not doing yourself any favors by looking through all of their private information and you are also risking worsening your own mental state. If both parties are communicating and finding mutually beneficial solutions, the odds are the results will be much better for all involved.

 

6) Be prepared with a plan for what will happen when the divorce is finalized

Hopefully, you’ve had time to make decisions about everything else, but until it’s over, don’t stop making plans and acting like nothing has changed just because your spouse left or took all their stuff. Once it’s over, it will be too late to try to get back anything that was given away or sold, so stay focused on what you should do now instead of living in the hope that things might change while they’re still around – especially if they have moved out of the house already. Here are two ideas, in particular, that should never be neglected if they apply to your situation after the divorce:

The first thing you should do is figure out what your budget is. If you have savings, use this money to help you stay afloat and use it for the necessary things. If you don’t have any savings, make a budget of how much money needs to be allocated for bills and buy only what is absolutely necessary until your financial situation improves.

Secondly, take care of your mental health. It would help if you found some way of coping with what has happened and worked on new ways of being happy again because divorce is not something anyone expects or wants to go through. If anything, in particular, brings up strong emotions, write about this or talk about it with a therapist to help process those feelings.

 

7) Don’t be too hasty when making decisions

This one may seem contradictory after talking about how important it is to be prepared for what will happen, but you should actually be moving forward with a plan that gives both of you some breathing room. You don’t want to rush anything just because emotions are running high and you shouldn’t start accusing your spouse (or yourself) without knowing more about where things really stand financially.

You may want to move forward with a plan quickly if you’re feeling overwhelmed, but this can lead to mistakes and have unintended consequences. Take your time and carefully consider your options before making any big decisions.

 

8) Don’t keep any secrets about your finances or other important information that could affect the outcome of your case

It’s important to keep no secrets from your spouse so that they are aware of what is going on and what will affect them. It’s never a good idea to keep anything hidden because it could come out at any time. You are setting yourself up for failure if you think that it will never make its way into the open. Being forthcoming, truthful and honest demonstrates a willingness to cooperate which will inevitably facilitate the divorce proceedings and reduce the chances of arguments occurring throughout the whole process.

It is worth noting that if you are already aware of damaging information relevant to the divorce, such as your spouse having an affair, this should be mentioned, but try not to let your emotions get the best of you and take any other accusations without having proof.

 

9) Be careful what you post on social media – it can be used against you in court

This may be one of the essential pieces of advice for someone divorcing in this digital age. These days, there are so many examples of how social media has been used against people, but far too many people are not aware of the implications. Even if you delete the post or picture, these can often be retrieved or stored on another device. Undeniable evidence, such as written posts or pictures posted online, can have a drastic effect on the divorce proceedings so it is always prudent to be aware that anything you post could potentially be used against you!

 

10) Don’t be too proud to ask for help when you need it

Divorces are a highly stressful time, and navigating the entire process without seeking help when it is required can negatively impact many aspects of your life. Here are some examples as to why you should never be too proud to ask for help when you need it during a divorce:

  • You’ll give yourself more time to make decisions and avoid mistakes that could have unintended consequences since other perspectives will help you think things through
  • You may question your judgment at some points
  • It can help make the process faster and easier
  • If you have kids, getting help for yourself will benefit you and, by extension, your children

 

 

To summarize,

Divorce is not what anyone expects or wants to go through. If you’re going through one, you must avoid making mistakes that can prolong the process and complicate matters for yourself and those around you. By preparing, communicating in good faith, and being forthcoming with your spouse, you can help negate a lot of them from happening at all and move on from the divorce much sooner.

If you are looking for a divorce lawyer to represent your best interest, then Tailor Law is the perfect place. Our divorce lawyers in Mississauga have years of experience in helping people just like yourself get through this difficult time with their knowledge and skillset that will be sure not only help resolve any issues but also make things go much smoother than they would otherwise
A professional demeanor can work wonders when trying win over new clients or keep old ones happy!

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